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The Undercard

written by Uncle Sam October 6, 2004

Cheney did well, somehow managing to pass himself off a human being, which is not easy for him. Edward’s hair was parted oddly, and as the debate wore on he did seem to diminish in stature. The moment of introduction was priceless, with Cheney looking deadly serious and somberly nodding as his name is mentioned, Edwards wheeling ferally to the camera and flashing a smarmy fashion-runway smile. Good lord. I hope someone tells him to stop doing that.

Both guys are good talkers, never lose the thread or wheel off into uncharted oceans of previously prepared material, unlike their better halves. It’s funny how an aura of diminishment hovers over these “vice” presidential debates, no matter who the guys are–it’s like a bronze medal match or a performance to an empty house, just a little sad.

Not a big fan of Edwards. The guy seems to have no moral center. He’s too young, too clean, and that smile is pure used car salesman. Boy is he a southerner. He is so vulnerable to the “personal injury lawyer” attack, which rouses something primal in people for some reason, and crosses up class and party lines. He may not necessarily be shallow and opportunistic in reality but in a dirty fight, those big white teeth could get hurt.

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